Tuesday, February 16, 2010

. . . ________ ”Senator Bayh”

(sung to the tune of "American Pie")

What felt like a long time ago. . .

I can still remember

How that headline made them smile

And he thought if he could have his “Change”

After the falling stock exchange

That maybe they’d embrace liberals for a while



But February made them shiver

With every poll Gallup delivered

Bad news on the doorstep

Barry couldn’t take one more step



I can’t remember if he cried

When he stood next to his widowed bride

But something touched me deep inside

The day Liberalism died.



So bye-bye Senator Evan Bayh

Brown drove his truck through the muck

And became the 41st guy

Freedom lovers drank their tea and served up some humble pie

Singing “this’ll be the day liberals die”

“this’ll be the day that they all die.”



Did you write the book of free love?

We know you don’t have faith in God above

Bibles are for a plumber named Joe

Do you believe in free markets, “no?!”

Can you trust a ballerina named Rahmbo?

And can you teach me how to shovel DC’ snow?



Well we all knew you were in love with him

‘cause we saw you drinkin’ Kool-Aid in your gin

We watched you kick off your shoes

For a tingle up the thigh of Matthews



Scott was once a Cosmo photo-buck

With a campaign slogan and a pickup truck

Martha Coakley? She was out of luck

The day, Ted Kennedy died.



I started singin’

"Bye-bye Senator Evan Bayh"

Tried to cash in your Clunkers

But the coffers were dry

Them tea-partiers were lifting signs, so was I

Singing "this’ll be the day liberals die

This’ll be the day liberals die."



Now for 14 months they’ve been on their own

And blamin’ Bush just makes us want to moan

But that is how he came to be

When Barry sang in the key of “me”,

With the support of radical college deans

And a voice that came from Alin-sky



And while the kings of the world watched him bow down

The voters revoked his gilded crown

The public court adjourned

The verdict “please do not return”



That pretender with his book of Marx

The speech he gave in cold Grant Park

Was like some trite dirge in the dark

But America, she would not die.



We are singing

“Bye-bye, Senator Evan Bayh”

Teddy left his seat wide open

To the Republican guy

McDonnell and Christie gave all Dems a black eye

And now Democrats are in short supply

Robert Gibbs just has no reply



Helter skelter in a jobless swelter

Israelis ran to their fallout shelters

Iran’s nukes were about to fly

They asked for help from their ally

Hillary had her tongue all tied

And Bill in stints was not found nearby



Now the mid-term air was sweet perfume

While the tea-parties sang of revolt in their tune

Dems all acted quite deranged

Because they never got their “Change”

‘cause the "moderates" tried to take the field

The tea-partiers refused to yield

Do you recall what was revealed

The day the “swimmer” died?



We started singing

"Bye-bye Senator Evan Bayh"

Drove Barry’s agenda to DC

Thought you’d give it a try

Them good ole’ boys took their bribes and they lied

And this was how the liberals died.

When Joe Wilson shouted “You lie!”



Oh, and there they were all in one place,

Harry Reid was about to lose his race

(and lost in space)

Pelosi refused to start again

So come on: Barry be nimble, Barry be quick!

Barrack could not try a new slick trick

Cause socialism is the devil’s only friend



Oh, and as I watched him back on a campaign stage

Voters hands were clenched in fists of rage

No loss of seats in Congress

Could stop their Health Care progress.



And as his poll numbers dropped out of site

Democrats all showed they had no fight

I saw him act like all was right

The day his agenda died.



He was singing

“Bye-bye, Senator Evan Bayh

I will give another speech

With a wink in my eye

Republicans obstruct me saying 'No' all the time

And I think that my agenda will die

This’ll be the year it’ll die"



I met a girl who swung the gavel

And I asked her to stop all her silly babble

But she jerked a smile and kept right on

I went down to the sacred store

Where I’d read the Constitution years before

Even when the liberals hoped it might be gone



And in the schools the children still chanted

Matthews cried and Olberman ranted

But not a word was spoken

The teleprompters all were broken.



And the three men I admire most

"Waterloo" Jim, Rush and the Gipper’s ghost

They caught the party train for the coast

The day the Health Care Bill died



And they were singing

“Bye-bye, Senator Evan Bayh

Drove our neighbor to the Polls

And voted for our new guy

Vote ‘em out of office so liberalism will die

and perhaps then they won’t even try

and once gone they can’t even try"




We’re all singing

“Bye-bye, Senator Evan Bayh

Drove our pickup to the Polls

And voted for our new guy

The good ole’ boys won’t drink on my taxpayer’s dime

and once gone they can’t even try"

1 comment:

Chris said...

HAHAHAHAHA!